Monday, January 17, 2011

Secret Driving Selves

Wow, I'm really bad at keeping up on this thing, aren't I? I swear I will try to be better.

Today I had an epic journey* around Burbank trying to find a copy of "Portal" for PS3 (because I don't own an XBOX or a PC). While making this epic journey I came to a realization:
People have a separate, often evil, version of themselves that only makes itself known when we are driving. Particularly in parking lots. This is when our true driving colors begin to bleed through our carefully constructed image of a kind and courteous driver. Some people become full of rage, shouting at cars when they cut them off, gesturing elaborately or simply flailing their arms in dismay at the crazy battleground that is the parking lot. Others grip the steering wheel tightly, their lips set in a hard line and glare at the cars all around them, as if they can will others to clear a path and stay out of the way.
And then there's my favorite (sarcasm alert!) the shooting of the arm out of the window. This seems to be a favorite strategy here in California, especially on the freeway. The driver of the car is either too distracted or lazy to plan ahead when a lane change he needs to make is approaching and so when he is suddenly forced to try to find a pocket in the traffic he becomes enraged. He continually tries to leap into spaces that he can't fit into, or that other cars are already claiming. Finally, he rolls down his window and thrusts his arm out, making an angry pointing gesture or fist to signal to the other cars that he means business. I hate when this happens because for some reason the driver who uses it automatically assumes that now that he has his arm out the window, he MUST be given the space to get over. As if no one else knew he wanted to change lanes until he thrust his arm out of his window. It's just down with such force and arrogance, it makes me mad. This happens in parking lots as well, though not as often.
My secret driving self does have its moments, though I think that my driving self is a bit calmer than other people's driving personalities. Yes, I will swear more often when people are stupid or my way his hindered by slow pedestrians, yes, I will sometimes slap my hands on the wheel in frustration. But overall, I do not shout, I do not make rude gestures, and I will still act reasonably calm as I navigate my way through the forest of the parking lot. I try to maintain some kind of control.
We all have our secret driving selves, we can't deny it, kind of like an evil twin, emerging when the blood lust for parking spots sets upon us.
It just goes to prove what my grandfather used to say "Parking lots are the most dangerous places to drive".

Just food for thought.

*Full details of my epic journey can be found on my Tumblr:
http://zana13.tumblr.com/

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